Some day...

... I need to spam a litte again ^^ No, I'm just posting a few things that move me at the moment. :)

It's incredible how fast my life changed in the last... nah... 2 months?? Before it I was crawling in my hole saying uhh - artists need to suffer to be good, go away I don't want your cure. And now... whoop, sunny side up! Without therapy, I promise :) 'N this is the reason... or are the reasons, why. 

I can't even tell you how happy I am that the boys are back... If their reunion wouldn't have been, I'd probably be covered with shit up to my throat now. Their comeback kept me from breaking completely. Sounds insane but I think it isn't. If you ever had a person that pulled you out of a mental hole, you know what I mean. Watching THIS above even keeps me from falling back into the old shit... And rarely something or someone makes it to prevent a relapse when I threaten to get one. So I can't tell you how glad I am now. I think I will finally make it out of all that shit... and begin a new life (I know I told that a hundred times already but ... well xD) Now's like Chuck & Cindy: lovin' life 24-7 x) Thanks for pushing me back to the surface, boys.

And I think I'm gonna show you some WIP's of the first steps of the 2nd half of my mega drawing... I had some slight anatomy problems with dear Scottie but I think I solved them now. But see yourself :)

I'm somehow glad when this piece is finished... slowly starts getting strenuous, especially now that I'm shooting a making of video while drawing this one... My PC doesn't like that flood of data... at least moviemaker doesn't, it takes ages to save the videos down because they are so big. 

And I don't wanna keep the song of the day away from you - I listen to it on repeat oO Found it in my music collection today not knowing that I had it xD This is the intro song for the show of my buddy's cover band. I sooo love that piece.

Fits my feeling of life perfectly at the moment x) I hope now everything's going to work out... 

Ah yes btw - I'm going to watch that movie another time on monday together with the friend I had with me when we watched it in Munich... I told my head to shut up in 2013 and so my inner voice said ey - c'mon go and watch that movie another time. So we are going. And after that I'll spam my brain with a play on repeat of that interview above. End of the story. After that I'll take care of my anticipation for London in May. Everything else has to go. I like that saying: "If it doesn't nourish your soul, get rid of it." And that's what I'm doing at the moment. :)

So and now I stop spamming, it's already way too much xD Cya :)

It's done, it's done!!!

My first drawing video is finally online! It's not good (well I did it for the first time... ^^°) but anyway... More parts will follow when my internet is fast again =)

Chaotic me while trying to create a drawing... xD You can even see my stupid face for a few times in the beginning. Well actually only nose and glasses but ey :D

Finding music for this piece was a hard one... on one side it had to be something that isn't blocked in Germany, and on the other side I rarely have songs here that last more than 8 minutes... -.-° Next videos will be shorter. Have no choice...

Finally...

... the first half is finished... The scan is a little crappy but I had to make sure that Abz' white shirt stays visible... so here you are :)

Done with HB, 5B, 7B, 8B, mechanical pencil and black pastel pencil on A3 sketch block. Time about 2 weeks, every day a few hours...

And I tell you what .. I shouldn't have watched that cursed movie. (If you don't know what I'm talking about - I mean Nightwish's Imaginaerium) ... I thought I'm out of this all but now that guy is jumpin into my face in form of pictures ... And I hope that stops because that won't change anything on my plans. He won't take my life away once more... It's over. This time I'm strong enough. I wish I would have never got caught in this trap... I'm thankful for every moment and journey I was able to experience because of that but I also hate what he and his music did to me and my mental health.. I could do so much better if that all wouldn't have been... Grr. Well. I won't go into further detail.

Have fun with the pic, see ya next time =)

ok...

... back from the cinema, every bone in me hurts but whatever...

So.. how was the movie then? I think it was a nice little guessing game ... at least for me. It shocked me, but at the same time it deeply impressed me how much genius (really, that guy is a damn genius. I may not be after him anymore but I still think he's a damn genius...) is behind that all. No - I didn't fall back x) All in all, the german synchronization couldn't keep the message from arriving. I just didn't find it so good that the movie is so confusing four outsiders... But anyway it was good =) And now I'm leaving to bed, my legs damn hurt -.-°° See ya =)

Idle ...

... ok not completely. But my brain is idleing somehow... Has something to do with the pic in the last entry... I twittered it but apparently I'm being ignored... I mean, my surface wouldn't bother, but on the inside I think I still like that guy a bit more than I am willing to admit... I don't know. It just hurts me in some way. Well but we can't have anything I guess. So I'm drawing on while time is running away unter my a**... got less than 7 weeks time to finish the 2nd and the other 2 guys and then get it printed... GNAH. 

And I'm drowning myself in that NANA stuff at the moment.. I shouldn't do because it additionally saddens me.. and makes me slightly aggressive. But at least - watching that stuff and being distracted by it makes me feel the pain a bit less. Still I don't know yet again where I belong... 

On monday I'll go to visit the cinema with a friend in Munich.. To finally call that Nightwish stuff quits... Once and for all. I'm really sorry for everyone who thought I might stay there, I have to grab the chance now that it "threw me out" of there and I apparently am not tending to go back there. It is much better for my nerves, I've healed so much since I'm out of there. (Ok and I don't listen to metal anymore at the moment ... hm, should I worry? xD) Maybe I'm about to get a normal life now. Would be great. 

So.. yeah... I'm movin' on now, leaving my past behind. I just need to overcome that stupid idle phase I have at the moment... would love to sleep all day, eat a bit and sleep again... anyway. Here are a few WIP's for you so that you don't feel neglected by me just posting sentimental bullshit x)

Also: my fave song of the moment :) Listening to it on repeat... -.-°

Ok.

Finished my first work yesterday :) And began the 2nd in the morning then, discovering that the 2nd guy is horribly hard to draw -.- narf. I hope I won't ruin that drawing ... 

So I will show you something very special now - the VERY first portrait I've EVER done in my life, at art lessons at school... compared to the one I did during the last week. There is a big difference, isn't it? xD Can't believe the teacher gave me a B for it back then... I mean wtf? I'd give myself a F for that nowadays oO Even a F minus. But well, we all began small x)

And maybe some of you know who that could be x) I won't tell ya until the whole pic is finished. I'm also thinking whether I should do a background or not... but it's almost a little empty without a background... HM. I'll see then. =)
And I'd like to show you one of my fave anime series... NANA... I don't know but I somehow find myself in it... the little, naive girl who's only thoughts are how to get happy and a guy... Why having an extraordinary cool friend. You should at least read the manga... it's simply awesome <3

At the end of a successful day...

... I finished the hair of the first 1/4 of my pic x) (No I won't show ya ;) Be patient) Today's goal will be to do the shirt and then get it scanned and do a little advertising or so ^^ (Probably I'll show you then... but I'm more tending to show the full work first when the 2nd head is done....) We'll see. For now I'm satisfied with the outcome. And my mother just rushed in to iron a shirt for my sister who overslept... o_ô Well, shit happens, no need to get annoyed.

The sailormoon tarot project is on hold for now because I noticed I have only less than 2 months time to finish my mammoth project because it also needs to be printed ... So.. yeah... I need to hurry -.-° If I won't make it I'll need another idea... we will see. Won't tell too much here because somebody could steal my idea x))

Holy moly... But I should get finished quite good... needed a week now for that one head... gonna need 4 for all when I'm fast. Had the idea almost a little too late T_T

Btw - a big tip for you pencil drawers out there - Q-tips! The ultimate shading tool <3 I don't know how I was able to live without them oO I've ordered now big ones because the ones you can get at the supermarket are almost too short to hold them right so it's a bit complicated to work with them... :-\

So far for the status quo of now - I'm out again, see ya :)

:D

A smiley should do as a title =)

*wiping off the dust* Sorry, it's been a while again ... Had a lot to do and so much stuff has changed... 

My creativity is back from vacation and fully working again =) I began my mammoth project some days ago and it looks quite well so far. And I'm having big plans with it *hehe* xD  Just for you I'll upload a little WIP... I won't spam you with them this time because that project is top secret x) 

Maybe some of you who are around my age remember who that could be x)) (I still love those dazzling blue eyes and the charming person they belong to ^^ Should have done that pic in color but me and color pencil = no good -.-°) This is only the first half of the picture. well ok the first 1/4 .. 3 more heads to come. And another sheet of A3 paper.

Another thing - I think I will call my Nightwish era quits with watching their movie on the 18th... At the moment I feel like I fell into another dimension. I feel like I'm 12 again actually, not 14 anymore xD And I've never been doing better like I do at the moment. I don't the heck know what I've been doing the last 12 years, really oO Feels like I ran into total bullshit... But now I'm free of this cursed burden and can begin a new life =) Who knows where this will take me, I'm curious. 

So then, I'm off to bed now.. long day to go tomorrow, I forgot some pics for the nail shop and have to add them now... And I need to draw draw drawwwww xD If my secret project works as intended, I'll show you the result here x)) 

*Art Refugium over and out*